All tagged JSBach

When singing the St. Matthew Passion with the Munich Bach choir one moment stood out: silence. The silence entered when our conductor intentionally held onto the rest after Jesus bowed his head and died. He stood still, with his arms in suspension, cradling the time. It was as though the whole audience sighed together, like our hearts stood still for a moment, pausing in unison. Since then I have known that conducting the pause is as important as conducting the whole Passion...

Leaning into Mercy, or: Resisting Resistance

The arias in Bach’s Passions are wells of deep emotion. Time stands still, while we follow a movement of heart to the depth of our soul. Bach’s aria “Have mercy, my God”, invites us almost to dance through our bitter weeping, to resist our resistance, and to open the heart to graceful mourning and the gentle desire for mercy.

With his Passion JS Bach has created a grand lamentation. He does not to believe that coping with our fears and sorrows means to keep them in check in order to quickly get over them. Instead his music gives us a container for our sorrows and seduces us into the beauty of lamentation. Joining in this orchestrated experience of mourning can actually be self-soothing and a strategy for resilience in the face of tragedy.

When singing the St. Matthew Passion with the Munich Bach choir one moment stood out: silence. The silence entered when our conductor intentionally held onto the rest after Jesus bowed his head and died. He stood still, with his arms in suspension, cradling the time. It was as though the whole audience sighed together, like our hearts stood still for a moment, pausing in unison. Since then I have known that conducting the pause is as important as conducting the whole Passion...

With his Passion JS Bach has created a grand lamentation. He does not to believe that coping with our fears and sorrows means to keep them in check in order to quickly get over them. Instead his music gives us a container for our sorrows and seduces us into the beauty of lamentation. Joining in this orchestrated experience of mourning can actually be self-soothing and a strategy for resilience in the face of tragedy.

A Pandemic, memories of childbirth and JS Bach’s Passion.
Around this time last year, I was carrying a heavy load. Our tender little baby daughter was still growing, but ignoring her due date, making every step and breath more difficult with the hour. When she finally decided to enter this world I was thrown immediately into heavy labor which seemed to stretch for an eternity. Pain beyond any I have known was washing over me, the pangs of labor coming so fast for countless hours that I could barely breath or think. No indeed, it was not the graceful Yoga birth I had envisioned. In the end my baby and I clung to life as my doctor ended our passion by cutting me open, lifting our baby daughter from the wound, and stitching me back together. As they bound me to the operating table, both arms stretched wide open I could not help but remark what that felt like: to be tied to my own cross…